Sir, I note that Christmas preparations start earlier every year. I have already hired extra staff for Yule. With servant quarters most full, I barrack the new staff unto the stables, which I fear may be not to their liking. But their shouts of joy, hear
Sir, Tho' most unseemly to give gifts to lower orders, I have this fine print for maid Mary. She has been a most attentive maid, and pray she appreciates the story that plays out upon it. That of a master rogering the girl who brings him his dinner. I d
Sir, please supply two of the gutta-percha flapdoodles as illustrated. I enclose a Postal Order made up with the stamps of Her Majesty to the value of 4/-
Sir, I was shocked to learn of the recent mis-use of our club's fine Byron room. Patrons are kindly reminded that if you bring whores, strumpets or doxies into our establishment, will you please place a doily beneath them BEFORE you commence rogering th
Darling Emma, I am surging along with your life blood, coursing through the secret places of your body. I wish to escape from you but I am harried from place to place in my thots. I cannot escape from the rhythmic spurt of your love juice.
Sir, In this modern age I feel we have lost sight of the origins of All Hallows Eve, to whit : devil worship and punishing naked servants. Fortunately, I run a very traditional estate where traditional rituals are strictly observed.
Sir, Maid Mary asks what it do be like to live a life of finery and extravagance. Now, it may be the 4 brandies expressing eloquence, but I do invite Mary upstairs to sample the life of her betters. She leaves her old life, and on my instruction, her clo
Sir, to-day I do receive a flyer advertising a special show at the Parisian Club performed by Pierre Acrobatique and his assistants. I cancel tonight's theatre with Lady B___ and hasten to the club. I have always been something of a ballet aficionado.
Sir, Lady B___ is most pleased with our new maid, who cleans diligently and does not steal nor shirk. I too am most pleased with our new hire. On receipt of an extra shilling, she do work sans vêtements on Fridays whilst Lady B___ is away.
Upon presenting myself to the sun room for a fine breakfast, I discovered not one rasher of bacon upon the platter. It seems the cook's uniforms had not been returned from the laundry, and she did not wish to damage herself while cooking. She was able,
Sir, Maid Eleanor did recently avert embarrassment when Lady B__ found her naked with me. Eleanor explained her clothes were in the wash & she had no other to wear. As reward for quick thinking, I exchanged Eleanor's straw sack with a proper bed. El
Sir, I have often contemplated that the fairer sex of foreign lands do so often dress in a mysterious and attractive way that is so rarely seen at home.
Sir, It is said that at this cold time of year when provisions are low, that altruism is a saintly virtue to be rewarded in heaven. However, I offered maid Susan sixpence and a half sack of coal, and I was greatly rewarded that very evening.
