Sir, I have been hoodwinked! My previous posting of All Hallow's activities, and indeed this one, are both forgeries! Please consult the detailed article that I have noted within the replies to this posting.
Darling Emma, I am surging along with your life blood, coursing through the secret places of your body. I wish to escape from you but I am harried from place to place in my thots. I cannot escape from the rhythmic spurt of your love juice.
My new maid from overseas brings with her an unusual custom, and one that I am intrigued to introduce to my other staff. It is a most hygenic practice.
Sir, It is said that at this cold time of year when provisions are low, that altruism is a saintly virtue to be rewarded in heaven. However, I offered maid Susan sixpence and a half sack of coal, and I was greatly rewarded that very evening.
Sir, Gussy Herbert do send me details of a secret Ladies-only club somewhere in Pall Mall. I find this shocking to deny the attendance of Men, especially as the activities therein do appear most fascinating.
Sir, I note that Christmas preparations start earlier every year. I have already hired extra staff for Yule. With servant quarters most full, I barrack the new staff unto the stables, which I fear may be not to their liking. But their shouts of joy, hear
Sirs, With great anxiety I must request that you rush me an appropriate quantity of the Date Mate 1900 Pheromonotic liquid. Please understand that I request this product for scientific reasons alone. I enclose 10d postal order plus carriage.
Sir, I out to the furniture emporium, to purchase a chaise longue for Lady B___. Upon its delivery, I am most anxious as to it's comfort. I enlist Maid Ellie to advise me as to it's skin feel. "How do you mean, sir?" she enquires.
Sir, Maid Eleanor did recently avert embarrassment when Lady B__ found her naked with me. Eleanor explained her clothes were in the wash & she had no other to wear. As reward for quick thinking, I exchanged Eleanor's straw sack with a proper bed. El
Sir, Lady B___ is most pleased with our new maid, who cleans diligently and does not steal nor shirk. I too am most pleased with our new hire. On receipt of an extra shilling, she do work sans vêtements on Fridays whilst Lady B___ is away.
Sir, With much correspondence, I have hired myself a typewriting maid. It may be imagined that I permit her to work in this manner to prevent ink spoiling her clothing. Not so. I offered her an extra penny an hour if she might type out my letters whilst